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Kate Rancid



I like eating lettuce
It's by far my favourite food
I tried to eat tomatoes
But they didn't taste as good
I chewed a tasty serloin
It just didn't hit the spot
Oh I like eating lettuce
Yes I like it quite a lot.

There's something in the flavour
Of a tasty lettuce leaf
That lovely grassy texture
Is sublime beyond belief
The freshness of the meadows
Is in every juicy crunch
Oh God I just want lettuce
For breakfast, tea and lunch.

The moment that I place it
On my moist and eager tongue
It's like an angel singing
Some sweet song that God once sung
Like something almost holy
Has stirred within in my soul
And a million little fairy folk
Dance round my salad bowl

The heavens pour their glory
Upon my hot house bliss
And when I eat that curly stuff
My cheeks the cherubs kiss
My heart holds still for lettuce
Oh please give it to me!
Oh lettuce lettuce lettuce
You're as lovely as can be!

My God I want some lettuce
I really really do
I wish I had some lettuce
On which to munch and chew
Oh God I NEED some lettuce!
Oh God I need it now!
Some lovely curly lettuce
On which to dine and chow

Oh Lettuce! Lettuce! Lettuce!
Oh please bring me some lettuce!
Oh Lettuce Lettuce Lettuce please please please!
Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God I want some lettuce!
I'm begging you for lettuce on my knees!

Grrr [snort] herumph I need... lettuce...
Buh... buh... buh... eeenya-urk.... lettuce...
Water... water...? Lettuce
Oh God

juh... juh..





Kate Rancid (b. 1973)